Sex in America: We can’t have our cake and eat it too

By Joel A. Hess

Every day, another sex scandal. For the past decade, we have been shocked by teacher sex scandals. Before that, it was priests. We have become used to politician sex scandals, the honorable Roy Moore and Anthony Wiener notwithstanding. Now, we are enjoying a flurry of Hollywood sexual assault tales. Of course, little do they know that most of America assumed sexual assault was how you got into Tinseltown in the first place.

So now we fall on our fainting couches after checking our snapchat and putting on some Jay Z. Oh my! How ever did this come about?

The old whipping horses have been predictably marched out. Many say it’s due to our patriarchal society that allows men to be abusive. For sure, men can be jerks and have been allowed to be jerks with even mothers whispering “boys will be boys” on the sidelines. The next worse thing to a man abdicating his responsibilities is a man abusing his duty of the loving his neighbor. Others blame the corrupting effect of power; absolute power corrupts absolutely. No doubt about that. We all can turn into Caligula even with just a little power.

Yet, with these recent scandals in Hollywood, power and toxic masculinity don’t cut it as excuses. These assaults are being committed by people who completely agree, understand, and promote the dangers of toxic masculinity, abuse of power, and the whole feminist agenda. How often has America been lectured by actors, directors, and the glamorized left? Yet, here they are high fiving their mortal enemy, Roy Moore, as they treat others as animals existing for their own pleasure.

There is a deeper issue that drives sexual assault. It’s sex. Most of these perpetrators knew what they were doing is wrong. Whether it was a teacher who very much knew she would be scandalized forever or one of our favorite Hollywood actors who regularly preach how bad men are, they couldn’t help themselves! Their desire for sex was stronger than their ability to keep their hands off. Well, I suppose Louis C.K. kept his hands to himself.

We have created a culture that pushes sex in every avenue, and then we are astonished that people abuse it? We expose preteens to condoms and porn and call it sex education. Our social media is filled with nudity, stories of promiscuity, and heroic sexual exploration. Our music is literally filled with images of rape, rich pop artists calling women bitches and hoes, glorifying the swinging life. How have we worked so hard for women’s rights only to see women using their bodies to make money in music, TV, and college campuses?

Meanwhile, science demonstrates time and time again that porn is addictive and literally changes our brains like a drug. We mourn the victims of mass shooters while ignoring one common denominator: addiction to porn. Nearly every marriage that has broken down in my churches had a man who was addicted to porn. Its effects are documented and obvious. Porn, by the way, doesn’t just mean that crazy stuff. That’s how numb we have become. Most of the stuff your 13-year-old sees day to day online and on TV should be qualified as porn.

On one hand our society pushes sex and militantly shuts down anyone who says there should be any rules! Keep your laws off my body. We have attempted to completely separate the body from the mind. People actually believe that can have sex without consequences. Meanwhile, Planned Parenthood is busier than ever, and so is my office.

Suddenly everyone is shocked that we have a sex-abuse problem. We tell kids to do whatever they want, but then we throw them under the bus when they go just one step too far.

Sex without rules is Russian roulette! It has caused the downfall of civilizations and great heroes—Samson, David, JFK (if you believe the conspiracy, ha.)

If you don’t believe so, you are lying to yourself. If you think you can entertain in your mind, day after day, sexual images but never eventually act on them, you are a fool and danger to society.

The only way sexual assault will see a decline is if sex is raised up out of the gutter and restored to the beautiful place it deserves: in the cozy bedroom of a woman and man committed to each other unto death. Science proves that, as well. A recent study indicates that married people have more sex and more gratifying sex than singles!

Will this eliminate the abuse we see everywhere? No. The Bible, modern psychology, and your own experience demonstrate a deep desire that won’t totally go away until death: sin.

Does it mean that we should not aspire to something greater? Of course not! We aspire that everyone knows math, has internet, gets out, and votes. Why not put sex back in the marriage bed?

Of course, my next post will be about purity rings and conferences. Thank God, our purity is not accomplished by celibacy, but by Christ who gives us his purity for free! May you dear reader know this peace in this screwed up world. This peace is for you who have been a victim and for you who have been taught by society to be a perpetrator. We are all one or the other and many times both.